Your tits look amazing

Saturday April 1st Best Day Ever

The original plan was to stay another night in Brisbane but my friends Georgina and Harley (met in Bali) were in the Gold Coast and had invited us to a fun party for Harley. He would be leaving for the summer in the states (hes a wake boarding champ). So they were throwing a party for him at Club Love in the Gold Coast. Since Gold Coast is roughly an hour from Brisbane, we decided to check out a day early and make our way there as I told Emma, I’m sure this party will be pretty stellar. We had breakfast at the B&B and it was delightful. The innkeepers spoiled us with eggs and then we were off to get our rental car.

I rented from Hertz as that is what I know best. I used them for all my travels in the US when I was still working. I am a gold member and had some points we were going to use towards our rental. When we got there, a beautiful maroonish/purple small suv was waiting for us. We immediately were pumped. I worked in insurance for 5 years and I know how crazy rental car companies can be, so I gave that car a really good inspection and found that one of the tires had a rather large rip in it. That poor Hertz employee was swamped and now he had to get another car ready for us. He learned a lot that day because I had to confirm about insurance coverages (which he wasn’t very knowledgeable about). After about an hour, we finally got our road trip baby. She was a Mitsubishi and she was perfect. I can’t remember exactly what kind because they have some weird ass names for cars over here (like not the normal stuff you see back home).

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Finally we were off to the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary. Now this place was an absolute must see for us both. We are both animal lovers and frankly, I hadn’t seen a koala yet and I had been here for 4 months already. I felt like a little kid with the excitement of seeing Santa for the first time (when they know who Santa is not when you take them too early in life and they freak out and cry…why do people torture their kids like that? Remember stranger danger?). As we walked up to the sanctuary, I basically told Emma, “They are going to take all my money today and I don’t even care because I get to hold a koala!” We were on the same page, no amount of money was going to stop us from getting a cuddle today. Koalas are the freaking cutest animals ever. I could have stared and watched them ALL day.

“They can have all my money bc this is literally the best day of my life”

These furry babies were so darling. The hold was maybe a couple minutes but they were by far the best minutes of my life (could have made a sexual joke and I didn’t, progress guys).

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“your facial expression was the best ever” -Emma

This place wasn’t just a sanctuary for koalas, they also had Snakes, Dingos, Turtles, and lots of birds. We saw it all. The best part was the field of kangaroos that you could get up close and personal with. We bought a bag of food thinking these guys must be going nuts with all the snacks and pets from guests. After we finally found all the roos, they were all passed the F out. It was eerie. I’ve never seen so many kangaroos sleeping at the same time. I think we only saw 1 jump and it was for 10 seconds. I started to think too much and wondered if maybe they sedate them so they are friendly? I’ve seen these guys in real life and they can be pretty intimidating. Some of them looked like they went on a bender the night before. We did find a mom and her joey and got to feed her so that helped pull me out of my role of animal activist for a second.

We bought a package deal for holding the animals, we got to hold the koala and a python. The python’s name was Mia and she was super sweet. I know you all are cringing but I seriously love snakes and I always have. My Dad was fully prepared to buy me one when I was in middle school but my friends said they would never come over. Even at a young age, I knew having a social life was important to my development as a person. But we got to hold her and she was awesome. The best part about going to a zoo or animal sanctuary as an adult, is how quickly you can get through them. I can remember being a kid and it was an entire day of zoo stuff. But as an adult, 3 hours tops. After we watched the koalas do their thang a bit longer, we left for lunch.

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Can I just talk about how much I love Trip Advisor, Yelp and Zomato (here in Aus)? This is truly the power of the people at its finest. Its become habit now to look up ratings for places before eating. We happened to be about 15 minutes from Goodness Gracious Cafe and it was rated fairly well. We were both pretty hungry at this point, so it was go time. This was probably one of the best decisions we have made and hands down the best meal we had so far.  I had the Peri Peri chicken and Emma had the lamb ribs. I would try to describe it but honestly, it was so good I just know I wouldn’t do it justice. If you go to Brisbane, go there. That is all I’ll say. Also, I decided on this trip that I would be writing reviews everywhere we went (I’m pretty much an expert now on Trip Advisor). We still had a couple hours before we needed to get checked into our airbnb in the Gold Coast so we decided to drive to Mount Coot-tha Lookout where we saw the amazing view of the city. It was a beautiful day and the views were spectacular. Brizzy-we didn’t spend a lot of time together, but I’m sure I’ll see you again!

We checked into our airbnb and we tried not to assume anything about our hosts situation but we were a little concerned. She was fine, I think her name was Tracy or Tanya or something. She was an adorable middle aged single woman who used to body-build, so we all were going to get along. My issue was that it appeared she just moved in to that apartment as there were unpacked boxes everywhere. Also, she had a Colombian couple living with her. Emma and I were just renting the master bedroom with a bathroom. I’ll just say this, there was a crutch holding up the shower head. There wasn’t a ton of room but we were there only a couple nights so we were going to make it work.  We didn’t need to meet my friends until later so we went to a really nice dinner at Milan on Main. Our airbnb was in a really good location to this super cute area with tons of great restaurants and cafes. Milan on Main did not disappoint. We met one of the waiters, who had just moved from Melbourne. He spent half the time hitting on Emma and half the time giving us recommendations for Melbourne.

It was time to get bougie. I’ve partied with Harley and Georgina before and I know they like to have a good time. Plus, Harley has some money from all his sponsorships. I was fairly certain, we wouldn’t be paying for much if anything tonight. I looked up the club before we started to get ready and these girls were dressed to the nines. I asked Emma if she would do my makeup and if she had any clothes I could borrow. My girl came through on both accounts. After listening to some tunes, having some champagne and getting ready, it was time to Uber to the club. Georgina got us in no problem (no waiting in line for us) and we had what was an epic night! Love me some bottle service. Georgina was such a doll and hung with us the entire time and introduced us to so many people. We met Ty, Harley’s brother, who lived in Sydney. He offered to take us out when we got to Sydney the next week so we were pretty pumped. We all got pretty shitfaced and danced our asses off. Finally it was time to leave and Emma and I needed food before we headed back. Georgina told us of a few places, but we were sold when we heard kabab. At this point, we realized this was becoming our thing and we were 100% fine with it. I even bought some baklava and in my drunken state slurred, “Baklava is life.” And I really believe it is.


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